They either convince themselves they are better off not going beyond getting their feet wet (at best) or they deny and minimize their fears, which can lead to making reckless plunges. Well, the chronically painful realities of divorce that involve children may be likened to having a chronic and debilitating illness like arthritis.Instead of periodic flare ups of painful inflammation of muscles and joints we are left dealing with periodic flare ups of our children’s painful struggles to come to terms with our divorces, flare ups of our own painful struggles to come to terms with divorce and episodic painful dealings with our divorced spouses.The next morning, my neighbor came over and excitedly asked how my date went.I gushed a little about his freckles, how he held my hand walking home and what a great kisser he was.
In fact many single parents who are gun shy after divorce go in one of two directions.We had plans to go swimming that afternoon while the kids were at Grandma’s.In the middle of making pancakes, my phone buzzed with a text. Normally I feel heartache magnified by hopelessness over not being able to find anyone.“You know, you should really try dating more than one person,” Andrew said as he drove me home. “She never has to pay for dinner,” he’d said, and laughed.We’d just had pizza at his place and sort of watched a movie while making out on the couch. I thought that after being intimate with me, he’d made his decision.